Shhh. Do You Do It?

It’s something that we don’t talk about as adults. It’s a little taboo and perhaps embarrassing. I believe most people do it, some people don’t, some will admit it and others wouldn’t dare. It’s really easy to do, feels warm and nice, and is really a lot more convenient than the alternative. Do you do it? I do sometimes. Did you do it when you were younger and then stopped when you got older? Are you a lifer like me- meaning you always have and always will. Do you admit to it? Is it funny for you? Do you do it because of laziness? Is it gross to you? Do your friends do it?

What am I talking about?!?!?

Peeing in pools. Yeah, you know, when you got to go, but the pool feels delightful and the frozen margaritas are tasting oh so nice, and you really don’t want to get out, towel off, and go inside, so what do you do? Just go. Let her rip. Make hot lemonade. Swim around a little, act casual, don’t let your eyes water, and let it flow. If you’re really good at it you can talk while you’re doing it so your friends will never suspect a thing. Really, no one will know. And I know we’ve all done it before. If I have to pee when I’m actually out of the pool I’ll use the restroom, but if I don’t feel like getting out- and I really have to go- then I’ll let her flow. Hotel pools?--- Always getting pee-peed in. I don’t even know why these places have restrooms. Fortunately there’s probably enough chlorine in them to kill a small horse so I don’t see what the big deal is. I mean, don’t drink the stuff, but if you have to tinkle, it’s OK. Order another drink first and then just go.

So, do you do it in pools? Don’t lie to yourself. Just admit it…